Who Do You Heart?

Yesterday afternoon I decided to wear my I Heart Nerds t-shirt to the gym. I love this t-shirt for many reasons, not the least of which is its succinctness. There are other reasons, too: it's generally very comfortable and a perfect fit, it has fun colors, and it sometimes elicits a smile from some of the truly nerdy men (and women) wandering around the streets of Boston. Overall, a t-shirt for the ages.

So there I am, walking with my little ear buds securely in place, happily soaking in some sun, when I start to notice something. More specifically, I start to notice that people are staring at my t-shirt much longer than needed to read the three little words (does a heart count as a word? I'm counting it) that are written across the front. Now, those of you who know me know that I am constantly cursing the fate of women having breasts. And I could be considered a chesty girl, but it's not like the letters were stretched out over them, like the t-shirt was straining or something. Were people really just blatantly staring at my chest, though? I mean, do people really do that? I did a quick double-check to make sure I didn't spill any high-fiber Kashi down the front or anything and when I looked up, a jogger winked at me. Then it registered: yes. People really do look at girls chests. Especially when you advertise your love for glasses and pocket protectors across it.

I know. Not exactly a revelation for most of you readers. But it was just so achingly cliché that it almost ruined my I Heart Nerds t-shirt for me. When I had almost made it to the gym door, I caught out of the corner of my eye a homeless man* waving at me, pointing at his chest, and mouthing the words "I'm a nerd! I'm a nerd!". When he started to get up off his empty pail seat I sprinted the last 20 yards through the parking lot and slammed the gym door shut behind me, breathing the soothing eucalyptus deep into my lungs.

I guess I could just discard the I Heart Nerds t-shirt, or relegate it to pajama use only. Or maybe I just need to make some modifications?

I Heart Nerds (That Don't Live in a Cardboard Box on the Street)

I Heart Nerds (That Heart Hygiene)

I Heart Nerds (Who Are Cute)

I Heart Nerds (No, Not You)

A little masking tape, a Sharpie, and voila. I may still get some glances, but they won't linger for long!

*I must admit, this homeless man is my favorite. And by favorite I mean that he's delightfully witty and cheerful despite his lack of teeth, his scaly skin, and the permanent muffin crumbs in his beard. But he's definitely no nerd, hence the running.