The ins and outs of a young library media specialist's life. Rock, rock on.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Extreme Entertainment

Watching children nervously rock back and forth, hands shaking as their pencils scribble across standardized test booklets is not my idea of a good time, but it does allow me to get a good bit of reading done. I thought I'd start in on some of the kitschy-looking 1970's fiction I've located in my library (not all that hard to come by) and I've found a couple of real winners in the collection. But after four days of that, I had reached the saturation point.

This morning was so boring that I could actually feel my brain atrophying inside my skull. My eyelids were begging to be propped open Tom and Jerry style, toothpicks straining to keep me from slumbering. Please, Baby Jesus, just let me sleep away a bit of the boredom.

What could I do to entertain myself? There had to be something so exciting that I would no longer be in danger of embarassing myself by having my Principal shake me awake by the shoulders, sprawled out on a desk with a little puddle of drool pooled under my cheek. I quickly ruled out my idea of "borrowing" some of the band instruments to "test out", as well as my half-formed plan of building a fort made of books. I didn't have enough Krazy Glue to do anything that would hold my attention for very long and I wasn't desperate enough to try out the new hot glue gun. But then, as my eyes fell on my mini-fridge, I had an idea: I'd eat my fruit-on-the-bottom yogurt without mixing it up.


It kept me entertained for all of 4 minutes and nauseous for 4 hours. Who knew that the fruit on the bottom was actually just super-sweetened fruit product? It always tastes so real when it's mixed in with the yogurt. Then I started wondering about whether I had consumed the live cultures in the yogurt part or the fruit part, and I started to actually feel ill. It also made me very sad that all I had for the rest of my lunch was a salad and a Clif Bar.

Screw testing. Tomorrow I'm bringing a deck of cards and some Girl Scout cookies.

This might help pass some time too. Holy addictiveness.


Blogger Noelle rocks hardcore!

I think I hate you for linking to that game. However, it could be like methadone for my heroin addition called Minesweeper. (I swear, I'll stop as soon as I beat my best score on Expert!)

12:46 PM

Blogger Ween rocks hardcore!

I could use some kitschy fiction right now. I always liked those books where the girl had some kind of disease and found a boyfriend right when she got diagnosed.

I think I just found a way to spend the afternoon...because I'll be damned if I'm unpacking another box today.

12:54 PM

Blogger Beej rocks hardcore!

After that lunch, tomorrow you should bring sausage gravy. Just to balance things out.

1:27 PM

Blogger CarpeDM rocks hardcore!

I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. Oh my God, that is addictive. You have failed to achieve your goal. I'll achieve you, stupid game!

Hee. Ween, I remember those. One of the teen romance novels I remember was called PS I love you and the guy died and then, in another book, she found a new love with the newspaper editor. It was so sad.

1:58 PM

Anonymous Anonymous rocks hardcore!

fruit on the bottom is rank!

2:31 PM

Blogger Hooker rocks hardcore!

I avoid the fruit on the bottom like the plague. It's like melted cotton candy or something down there.

I try to rescue the last slivers of yogurt from the goo but i always leave some stragglers behind.

6:18 PM

Anonymous alyndabear rocks hardcore!

I'd pull out the fifty thousand pieces of paperwork I'm supposed to be doing for this year's teaching programme, and start with those. Care to make a start on them for me?

3:16 AM

Blogger Lisa rocks hardcore!

Standardized testing sucks!

5:00 AM

Blogger stilettoheights rocks hardcore!

when I saw theat ben wrote the words sausage gravy it reminded me of a restaurant here in Fat-hio that offers sausage gravy by the bowl, people out here eat it like it's SOUP!!!!!!!!!!!!

8:03 AM

Blogger NancyPearlWannabe rocks hardcore!

Noelle- You're welcome!

W- Like Lurlene McDaniels? God, the girls here love those novels. Which disease did you read? Cystic fibrosis? Cancer?

B- That's just wrong.

CDM- Did everyone love Lurlene McDaniels?! Maybe I need to order more of those suckers. Oh, and also: you're welcome for the Boomshine as well.

Anon- I suppose it's my own fault for not following yogurt directions. I only hope it doesn't ruin future yogurt experiences, as it forms the main staple of my food intake at school.

Hooker- That sounds like a good plan. But then aren't you just eating plain yogurt? Why don't you just buy the non-fruit bottomed yogurt then?

Aly- Point taken. I suppose the 8,000 books I need to shelve can wait a few more days.

L- Yes, yes it does. A whole lot.

Stiletto- I just gagged when I read that. Sausage gravy soup made me realize I was lucky to have fruit-on-the-bottom.

8:17 AM

Blogger Kelli rocks hardcore!

Wow. Things were slow at your "office" huh?
Too bad you didn't have a toostie-roll pop. You could've worked on the "how many licks" test.

10:15 AM

Anonymous Anonymous rocks hardcore!

sausage gravy sounds as bad as french fries with gravy and melted cheese on them....culinary delites

11:31 AM

Blogger NancyPearlWannabe rocks hardcore!

Oh, you had to go there, didn't you? POUTINE?!

11:55 AM


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