Summer: Too Much Time To Ponder

I've been thinking a lot the past few weeks; not having to work provides me ample time to ruminate on both my situation and the lives of others as well. And lately I've been thinking about how having friends and family and relationships and a general sense of connectedness with other people is what makes life both amazingly interesting and very difficult.

I've always maintained that trying hard to make yourself and the people you love happy is what life is all about, and I still believe that wholeheartedly. In fact, that might be the closest thing to religion, or faith, that I've got. But what about those times when there's simply nothing you can do to improve someone else's situation? Is it enough to just be sympathetic? Having empathy does not necessarily make you a better person, does it? I've been wondering how to rid myself of this feeling of disconnect between how much I feel for people and my actual ability to make them feel any better or alleviate their stress.

Quite a few people I know have hit rough patches lately. Tension seems to be mounting all around me, real things at stake. And intellectually, I know that I care and that I do what I can to help. I guess sometimes it just doesn't seem like enough.

I don't want summer to end, I'm not ready to go back to school yet... but damn, at least I won't have so much time to think.